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Sunday, August 24, 2014

Ladies Night, and Putting on a Brave Face

This week has been a rough one. I've had some ups and downs with my social life and medical issues. The ups pertaining to my social outings and the downs, with my never-ending back issues. Wednesday was chocked full of both. I try not to focus on the negative things in my world, I just don't see the point in spreading doom and gloom to those around me, either in person or on the internet but I will share a bit now. Not so much the doom and gloom just some facts about my life. Those who know me in real life already know most of what has been going on, but most of my on-line community has no (or very little) idea. Putting in mildly, I have a bad back (understatement). Over a year ago, I herniated my L5-S1 disc and the L4-L5 was bulging pretty bad as well. After months of physical therapy, we decided to go ahead and do surgery last October. Its been a long year of trying to simultaneously take it easy, and get my strength back. Some things have gotten better, the shooting nerve pain in my legs has lessened and I seem to have some nerve damage in my leg and foot, but it's not painful, just numb. The problem is my back still hurts on a daily basis, I am still medically unstable, I am still not back to work. Then newest doctors theory is that the metal hardware that was put in my back during that last surgery may be what is still causing me so much pain. So, Wednesday morning I went in for a minor procedure to inject my back with anesthesia right where all the metal hardware is. The idea is that if they numb up where the metal is, and the pain goes away, then we can take the metal out and all will be fixed (never mind the 4 small holes that will be left behind when all the screws are taken out). So this was the beginning of my Wednesday.

She Knits in Pearls

They told me I couldn't wear eye makeup, what kind of horse crap is that? Little do they know that I do not leave the house without my eyebrows. So, there stupid doctors rules. Things seemed to go smoothly and I came home to nap and take it easy for the day.

I had made tentative plans a few days prior to go out with some new friends for a glass of wine and some much needed girl chit-chatting on the same day as the procedure, I knew that I might not feel my best, but I just couldn't pass up plans with these lovely ladies. In the evening, when it was time to get all dolled up, I was still feeling pretty good. A bit sore, legs a little weak but not to big of a deal. Lets get pretty....

She Knits in Pearls Vintage

Thankfully, you'd never know from the picture that just a moment before, I was holding back a tear. Just as I was putting the finishing touches on my face. Literally, between the eyeliner and the lipstick, what was left of the anesthesia wore completely off. Leaving me in serious pain, each step and tiny movement was a surge of pain the likes of which I have not felt since my first few days post surgery. My loving and over protective man told me I needed to cancel my girls night (and he made a good point) but really, would you cancel plans when you already look like this?

Vintage Hair She Knits in Pearls

I just couldn't bear the thought of getting all dolled up only to have to cancel at the last minute as the pain set in. Isn't this why pain meds were invented? So that stubborn ladies like me can go out with there friends even if there body is telling them that the evening might be better spent in bed. I'm a tough broad, and I wasn't letting anything stand in my way. Even if that meant that I needed to use my cane (that I haven't used in months) and had to have a bit of help down the stairs. In the end, It was worth it.

She Knits in Pearls

I had a lovely time with two wonderful gals. The evening was filled with discussions of pin-curls verses wet-sets, and the merits of vintage, vintage-repro, and vintage appropriate clothing. There may have even been a heated debate over which is better, Bomb Girls, Land Girls, or Call the Midwife, the jury is still undecided on this one. Our little group may be small, but it is so nice to have met a few galls in person who I can have these debates with. I look forward to many more adventures with our rag-tag bunch of retro ravens. Next time I hope to not be fight against pain.

When the evening was over I wasted no time doing exactly what my body had been telling me to do, crawled into bed and tried to sleep it away. In the days since the procedure, I am not in nearly as much pain as I was that first day, but I can't say that it is all gone. I was really hoping that the shots would have taken away all the pain, but in fact it has gotten worse. My fingers are crossed that the area is just still inflamed and angry and that it will all settle down and go away soon. I will meet with the doc again in 2 weeks to evaluate what's going on and hopefully develop a plan.

I know this isn't my normal sort of post as I like to keep things focused on my knitting, crafts and general love of vintage style. Thank you for letting me share more of my life with you all.

Until next time, try to keep your best face forward, I know I am.

Cherry

Outfit details:
Dress - Thrifted from Jade Boutique
Purse - Guess Outlet Mall
Shoes - Payless
Cardigan (in bottom picture) - made by me

6 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing! I'm with you that it's important to put your best face forward and try to stay positive. BTW you look stunning "all-dolled up!" If it wasn't for you telling me, I wouldn't have even guessed about the pain you are in. I hope things will improve soon :)

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    1. Thank you for your compliments. I try to stay positive as much as possible. It's a delicate balance when I'm blogging. I want to write the types of posts that I enjoy reading. I like positive motivational types stuff and I also like to feel like I'm friends with the writer and getting to know them as a person. That includes the good and the bad. Thank you for reading.

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  2. Yikes, that back issue sounds really rough. I'm so impressed at your ability to power through it, although you're so right - if you already look that good, it would be a total shame not to get some mileage out of it. You look really beautiful, and it sounds like you had a great time despite the pain.
    Oh, and I haven't seen Land Girls, but Call the Midwife is miles ahead of Bomb Girls.

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    1. I think if you prefer Call the Midwife over Bomb Girls, you will really enjoy Land Girls. In my eyes they are all amazing and have their own pro's and con's. I prefer the storyline and history of Call the Midwife, but the costuming and music of Bomb Girls is so stunning and a constant inspiration. Thank you for reading my little speck in a big blogosphere.

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  3. First of all, many, many gentle hugs and the utmost of understanding. I appreciate that you spoke so candidly about what you've been enduring as of late (and longer when it comes to your back). While I tend to prefer to focus on the good in my life, too, especially on my blog, sometimes we really need to share our worries, stresses, problems and the like with those who know us online. Putting our thoughts down on (virtual) paper is extremely therapeutic unto itself and can often (at least for me) help us get back to our usual extra cheery state of being (not of course, that one isn't entitled to rough/bad/stressful/etc spells sometimes - of course we all are!).

    Please know that if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here to listen and help however I can be, lovely lady.

    Sending countless gentle hugs your way,
    Jessica

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    1. This is just one of the many reasons I find you so inspiring. You are so gentle and understanding and willing to reach out a supportive hand. My health issues are not chronic, I have not been dealing with this for the majority of my life, but it has been all consuming for the last year. This blog has been a way for me to express and share a bit of myself and feel like I am still a contributing member of society, even though I am unable to work and some days don't leave the house for days on end. This has been a way for me to focus on the positives. Every thing I make or every outing I go on is a success and a source of joy. This is my place to express that. On the flip side, sometimes I will need to share bits of the negative parts, if I didn't/don't then I'm not being honest with myself or my readers and that's not who I am. Thank you so much for your support and cyber-friendship.

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